Labor Day Weekend

This weekend has been just short of terrible.


Our AC broke Saturday.[We had it fixed on Tuesday. Thankful it was a cheap and easy fix! Thankful for my parents who gladly opened their home to us for the weekend so we didn't have to pay extra for holiday labor.]


We had lots and lots of rain (7 inches in 2 days) so the laundry room and garage flooded(ish). [Thank goodness for built in drains]


The "bar tap" water filter under the kitchen sink broke loose and flooded the kitchen, which has hardwood floors. [Thankful the kitchen is located over the garage and not the finished part of the basement.]


I busted my tail in my parents garage Monday night. [So thankful I wasn't holding Hudson.]


The electric dog fence has not worked since we had trees cut Friday... we got a call Tuesday morning that Bronco had been on the country club golf course all morning (which is across Rainbow Drive from our house). [Thankful he was found and safe.]


Dustin and I were so looking forward to spending the weekend together, working on home projects and playing with Hudson. It didn't happen that way and was very disappointing. We really tried hard to see the positives. 

Life Lately

Life lately has consisted of...

Work - winding down and wrapping up... getting prepared to be out for a couple of months

Baby - everything right now revolves around getting ready for this baby... between cleaning the house, cars, dog to lots of shopping and reading and planning.

Friends and family - spending as much time as possible out and about with friends and family

Writing on the baby blog - Baby Boy Morgan

Lists...

My head is full of lists right now.... here's a peek...
Baby stuff:

• boy or girl
• nursery decor
• names
• maternity clothes
• to 4D or not to 4D - some of them look creepy!
• life changes and responsibilities

House stuff:

• renovation - where to start
• money for renovations
• closing
• when will we move in?
• make sure the fence is secure enough for Bronco

Work stuff:

• JCAHO is due any day now
• keeping up with paperwork
• what in the world do I do with this kid or that kid

Loss

I have been at a loss for words recently...

As you know, my grandfather, "Da" passed away Friday, October 22, 2010 peacefully in my mother's home, with his family surrounding him. His funeral was held the following Monday. We went a little on the nontraditional side with the eulogy. Instead of having a friend of the family or his priest speak to his life and character, we decided that we should do it. He was so funny and there were so many stories to try to condense. We joked that most of the stories were not fit for the general public :). I did the introduction.... which went something like this:

Jim, Sonny Boy, Max, Mr. Reid, Daddy: My grandfather, James Max Reid, had many names, but I named him "Da"... actually, I was the first grandchild and he claimed the first sound out of my mouth as his name. He was a man of confidence, strong will, pride and independence.  This is a man who rode a horse for transportation until after he came home from the Navy. It still impressed me how quick his mind was.  My Da was able to recall stories from his childhood with amazing detail like how he felt when his daddy tried to take him flying for the first time in his crop dusting plane but his mother was screaming and chasing the plane down the runway until his Dad had to stop and put him out to calm her and then in the next breath tell you how much the DOW was up or down for the day because he had been watching CNBC since he woke up.  He would ask to be reminded if we had ordered at the restaurant but at the same time he could discuss global ramifications of current economics and details of political debates.  Can you imagine how much he saw come and go in 84 years?  So much of it he didn't understand but thought we were brilliant because we did, like the information I looked up for him on the internet, my Mom helping him shop for a fedora on ebay, or navigating a route on our smart phones.  He thought everything we did was great and he was always quick to encourage, thank or give a compliment: "Baby, that was the best meal I ever had", "Thank you, Baby", "You are so smart", "You look so pretty today". He loved to be surrounded by family and friends listening to and telling stories. In his last hours with us, that's just what we did... we gathered around him sharing our stories, hoping he could hear us. He heard new exploits of our youngest family members: Hugh, Pascal and Grace as well as the re-telling of well-worn family history through tears, laughter and prayers until he was finally at peace.   I got to see him enjoy the best love this world had to offer and to know that in the next instant he was welcomed into heaven to receive the perfect love of his savior Jesus Christ and have a reunion with his beloved wife and son and he missed so badly. What an honor to be a part of that.  We can't thank God enough for how good He has been to us.
 
Others that spoke were Bill (brother-in-law), Bruce (son-in-law), Harrison (1st grandson), and my dad (son-in-law). It was beautiful, funny, sad, and overwhelming. Everyone did a fantastic job. The priest even commented that more funerals should be done in that way and that he really enjoyed getting to know him better.

On Monday, November 1st, my mother was told that her immediate supervisor and friend at work had been found in the trunk of her own car after she didn't report to work that morning. You can read the article in our local paper (Gadsden Times). I really have nothing to say but please be in prayer for my mother. I don't know how much more she can take.

Insomnia

I've pretty much decided that I'm never going to sleep. I've been packing boxes for the big move since I got home (on and off with breaks for Grey's Anatomy and Private Practice of course :). We have so much stuff for such a small house! So far, I've packed 14 Paint The Town paintings, ALL of my elephants, candle holders, and other decorative stuff. I've also been doing laundry and packing to stay with Da this weekend. I'm a little nervous because he is so sick but I'm sure we'll be fine. I'm very excited to play with his puppy, Monroe... and hopefully get some exercise in... maybe we'll walk around the block a few times.

I'm so excited about moving in with Mom & Dad. I think I will feel a lot safer while D is at work. I mentioned in my last post that I felt like God was gently nudging us out of this house.  Our neighborhood has been through some random car and house break-ins lately... and it's supposed to be a "safe" area of town... not feeling so safe over here! Our house has some major water/drainage/foundation issues... it always smells like mildew, none of the doors close all the way, etc... [sooooo happy it's just a rental and I don't have to worry about fixing it]. And last... the owners are wanting to renovate soon.

I think I hear the dryer cutting off... until next time :)

We're Moving!

Bye bye Whittier St...

Hello Mom & Dad's... again!

We've been interested in buying a house for a couple of months. We've looked at 2 (so far) but didn't really feel like they were what we wanted. God has really been nudging us out of this house for quite some time. We trust that He will provide a home for us. In the meantime, we plan on living with my parents for a couple of months. We'll be able to save an extra $1000 month just getting rid of our rent and utilities. This is such a blessing for us as we really want to be stable and comfortable when we find the right house and we don't want to settle. We understand we will need to compromise on something unless we build (which won't happen), but we do have some deal-breakers. We are so blessed to have parents who love and support us. 

It's not fair...

Lately, I've been acutely aware that life is just not fair for anyone. Somehow that doesn't seem to make it any easier knowing that everyone else has issues too. The patients that I see on a daily basis definitely don't have a fair life but it seems like I can leave that at work... I do feel bad for them but it doesn't personally effect me like other situations I know...

Meal organizer

This is the coolest invention ever :)

http://takethemameal.com/

One of those weeks...

... and it's only Wednesday!  Had a rough couple of days at work so far. Dustin worked last night so lucky him got to avoid my wrath :). I went to put my phone on the charger because I got tired of it telling me there was less than 20% battery left, then less than 10%. It would NOT charge.... no matter what I did. It has done this a couple of times before but I have been able to get it to work with a few tricks courtesy of the internet. Not this time. I did everything that was recommended... even things that seemed stupid and irrational (flip the ringer on/off switch 4 times while holding the round button and plugging it in at the same time - I don't have enough hands for this!).

I was desperate. I even set up an apple rep to call me and give tech support... super efficient by the way. I didn't have to talk to anything automated or press 75 buttons to talk to a human. I put in my info and complaint online and they called me as soon as I hit enter... ready to help after verifying that I was me. Really cool! Especially since I usually wait until I'm in over my head and frustrated to tears before I call tech support about anything... and by that time I have the patience of an autistic 3 year old and can't talk calmly or rationally to the automated voice or the human that connects after 15 minutes.

They weren't super helpful for my problem though and suggested that I go to the nearest apple store... or send in my phone and wait 4-5 business days for a new one. Ummm right.... that's not going to happen. My whole life is on this phone! So I set up a "genius bar" appointment for 6:30... came home from work, picked up Dustin, and hit the road. We were in and out of the apple store in 25 minutes and then to PF CHANGS! Great dinner, then Barnes & Noble, now we're home and all is right with the world :)

Idols...

Our fantastic jack of all trades (music & youth minister), Adam Swann, filled in for our pastor (Eric) this week. He brought up some interesting points about idols in our lives. Being raised in church, I've heard it before but it's always good to be reminded that if God is not getting our attention, something is. Lately, that something for me has been facebook. Sad, I know. I was totally getting wrapped up in all the gossip and even the mundane stuff that was so readily available. I didn't delete my whole profile or anything. There really are some people on there that I genuinely care about and would like to be able to contact. I think I can muster up enough self-control to not check it every 5 minutes. To help with the temptation and to have some sort of action/follow-through, I deleted over 100 people. Part of me thinks it's sad that the majority of those people won't notice I'm gone from their feed. The other part worries a little about the few messages I'll get wanting to know why I "de-friended" them. It would probably be rude to tell them that I just can't take the multitude of negative comments anymore or the minute to minute updates on your life or even the continuous ramblings about your children with full details regarding their bodily fluids (certain people are excluded from this and you know who you are :). Part of me feels like facebook serves the following purpose: "connect with old friends" - that's what they tell you but it's mostly to see who's fat, pregnant, married, divorced, lost it, or got it all together - at least on the outside.

Maybe this should be my public profile... I'm fat, married, happy, and have it together (most days).

10 years!

I don't think I've changed that much :)

10 years ago I thought I knew exactly where and who I would be right now. *insert belly laugh*. I'm actually not that far off the mark. 

From what I remember, my goals and idea of the future were:

Graduate college (done :)

Get married (done :)

Stay married (so far so good :)

Have at least one child (not yet)

Live in a home that fits my life (kind of)

Have a ton of savings (not so much, but working on it)

Stay super close with ALL of my friends (LOL - nearly impossible)

I really didn't expect to grow as much as I have over the last 10 years... I guess I thought that I was already done growing :) Looking back, I see that the goals I remember having from 10 years ago are so skewed... I wanted "The American Dream"... get. get. get. I had no idea all of the giving opportunities I would have over the years. I have been so fortunate and blessed to be able to give my time and money to several charities and causes. I have remained involved in church and still strive to keep God first in my life (more so in the last 3 years than before). Where the things listed above were a major focus in my life 10 years ago, now they are more suggestions or perks. I know now what really matters to me... God and family (this includes the friends that have become my family).

Me, Jennifer Freeman Whiddon, Emily Barnes Harris, & Rachel Gossett Bone

Steve & Emily Harris

Andy & Jennifer Whiddon

Joseph & Rachel Bone

Me and Hope Thomas Reese

Our senior Year Book - I still love it :)

So much to say...

.... just not publicly. Dustin and I have been very busy lately with coordinating our work schedules, social lives and sporadic family emergencies that seem to be more frequent with an ailing grandfather and other random occurrences. Here's a synopsis of the past few weeks...

• Dustin's mother took a pretty bad tumble the day before Father's Day/my birthday and broke her fibula, requiring corrective surgery with a plate and 12 screws.. .ouch. 
• I had a birthday since my last post (the day after). Woo hoo! 28 feels the same as 27 :). Dustin had to work the weekend of my birthday/Father's Day so I spent Saturday afternoon with his family at his grandfather's house. I was able to spend all of Sunday with my family. It was so nice to just float around in the pool in the peace and quiet with my mom and dad.. talking only when we wanted to. My mom's sister was in town, visiting Da. We watched several hours of the home movies and reminisced, laughed and cried. It was fantastic! It's been a long time since I've spent my birthday with my family like that.
• The next week yielded more work for both of us. Our department has been without a director for about 8 months... and while that is nice sometimes, it puts a strain on everyone to pull the weight. Our new director started June 21st. He seems like he will be a fair boss who will get things done. He comes from another CHS facility (the company that owns our hospital) in Houston, TX that is about a year ahead of us in technology ;). Sad. We still do everything on paper! I would LOVE to go all digital and never have to write another note. At least we dictate our evaluations (at the outpatient center.. not the acute care side - those are still written).
• My friend with fertility issues is considering another route... prayers are welcome.
• My aunt's precious mother-in-law passed away Friday after a relatively short battle with cancer. her funeral is Tuesday.
• Someone we know is really struggling with alcoholism.... but I don't know if they know it is as bad as it appears from the outside. Their kids and spouse are suffering. The kids should NOT be allowed to witness what they have witnessed.... And that's all I'm going to say about that before I get myself in trouble. Just know that this family needs your prayers.

Home Movies...

For Father's Day/Mother's Day I am converting our old home movies to DVDs. Wow. I have laughed till I cried and cried till I laughed alone in this house. It is so fascinating to see my mother in her 20s with so much on her shoulders and still carry herself with grace. It's amazing to see my parents as present, attentive, and patient as I've always remembered. It is so overwhelming to see the love in their eyes. It's truly been empowering to me over the last few days. I have seen these videos a handful of times in my life and each time I come away feeling something different.

circa 1985

To my amazing parents....
As I sit here (up way too late because I can't pull myself away) watching these home movies, I am overwhelmed by your love. You have both been nothing but encouraging, kind, grateful, and loving toward me and I am forever grateful to you. 

Mom, as I watched you fumble with a package and immediately had a flash back of sitting in the waiting room of the hospital, anxiously awaiting news from the doctors. I am overcome with the feeling that we almost lost you. I am so thankful to have had you this long and I know that each day we get to spend together is such a blessing. 

Dad, thank you for always teaching me... well... anything and everything. You never hesitated to let me try and coach me sweetly. 

I know I can never express my love and admiration for you to the fullest but know that I try :).

Love you!!!

Ashley

Life lately...

... has not included blogging but has been very busy all the same.

Da is home from the hospital. Thanks for all the prayers and kind words. He's slowly getting his strength back which is good but scary. The other day, he told mom that "that book fell in the floor in there" gesturing toward the bathroom (much further than we thought he could do independently considering he couldn't even stand up by himself 2 days before!). Mom looked in and found a book in the floor that had been sitting on the back of the toilet. Mom decided to hire a sitter since we all work full time jobs. One of the techs (Amber) we had in the hospital was a sweetheart and really connected with him. She started yesterday and Mom was able to run some errands and spend time with her sister.  When they got back to the house, Da told them he knew what they were doing and didn't want Amber to come back because he didn't need a sitter. He'll warm up to it. He really just wants company and someone to talk to/entertain him.

I'm back at work and thriving in a routine! I missed the kids and feel a renewed sense of commitment to them. [I've been feeling pretty burned out lately.]

(D, Reid, Me, Elizabeth)

My youngest cousin, Reid, graduated from high school last week and that makes me feel super old. [Our 10 year reunion is coming up in August.] I also got to spend a very little bit of time with my Aunt Cindy and cousin Elizabeth [Harrison was in London]. They came in from Plano, TX to see Reid graduate and spend some time with Da. It was so good to see them!

(Da & Reid)

My baby cousins are so grown!

D also had some family in from Texas...

Can you tell they're brothers?!

And... My nephew went for his school shots and check up and left with.... glasses :) His mom said she felt so bad because when he went outside with them on he said, "I can see everything and it's not fuzzy anymore!". 

Goodbye pity party...

I'm not...

• at the beach
• getting my money back
• happy about it...

BUT - I am...

• right where God wants me to be - that is blatantly obvious!
• spending precious time with my Da
• off for a week anyway
• giving my mom and aunt a little bit of a much deserved break doing night shift at the hospital
• getting to spend some quality time with Dustin as he only works Sunday, Wednesday and Thursday this week
• thankful for my friends and family that worked so hard to help me sell my "vacation" and for my friend that took me shopping today to help me get out of the inevitable funk of disappointment - which totally worked :)
• ready for the next opportunity to use my 2 brand spankin new beach chairs :)

Can nothing be easy??

Nope... it can't.

I admit... I'm an only child and I'm a little spoiled, but it seems that lately absolutely nothing in my life is easy. I guess I shouldn't say nothing. My relationships are easy (except for Da - but then nothing is really easy with him anyways).

I don't really have much to say right now... Da is still in the hospital. I'm sitting with him tonight.

I'm trying to sell my vacation but I have no takers... sigh.

Today =

Today = 151 days (5 months) since I quit smoking.

Today = I was in a funk... a really bad funky funk

Today = a reminder that I shouldn't expect others to do what I think they will do or say and I definitely shouldn't get my panties in a wad when they don't do/say what I "need" them to.

Today = a reminder that God is where my joy, satisfaction, hope, love... comes from (you name it... it comes from Him)

Today = a glimmer of an answered prayer - D got a call from goodyear! He goes in at 7am to do a physical and get a start date!!

Week in review...

With Rachel out for surgery, I had a full schedule!  It was nice to go to the hospital 3 days this week instead of the regular 2.

The Rehab Center schedule was PACKED with only one SLP (me) working.  We've been blessed with job security lately!!  

I was able to spend a couple of lunch breaks with my sweet friend, enjoying all the treats her small group made for her after her surgery.  There are some GREAT cooks in that group!

We did hour # 3 of Secret Church on Monday night. It was so great!  We ended up not having time for hour # 4 because it was actually 1 hour 20 minutes. We'll finish it this coming Monday.

I slept.. a lot. One night I fell asleep at 8:30 and woke up at 7:15 the next morning.  Last night, I know I fell asleep sometime between 8:30 and 9:30 because I have a couple of texts that I never even heard.  I woke up at 6:40 this morning panicking about being late for work.

My plan for today is to clean so we can host small group at our house tomorrow... so far?... I'm blogging :)

balance...

I'm trying to find the balance...

woke up at 11:15!
d's at work... till 9...
got the...
doors open...
music blaring...
bronco laying on my feet as I type...
cleaning...
laundry...
dishes...
all that stuff i don't have time to do during the week.
i don't think Bronco wants me to get up.
now he found a yellow jacket to chase around the house.